Dearest Billionaires,

It’s us-the Middle Class.

Can we talk?

(BTW you guys are not the easiest rich people to get a hold of.

We know you’re busy, but sheesh.)

So, we weren’t sure if you all realized that a few of you

are giving the rest of you a very bad name.

Isn’t it amazing how a few billionaire marauders have created

FOX NEWS in order to hoodwink gullible middle class Americans

into voting against their own financial interests?

They invoke God and Apple Pie to distract hard-working citizens

into supporting policies that support the “Super Rich Socialist Agenda”

(namely to have trillions of dollars of government bailouts and subsidies for themselves- paid for by everybody else.)

Of course, the Robber Barons don’t give a hoot about the people they are intent on manipulating. (We all know how they’ve bought off numerous members of congress so that they can continue their “Reverse Robin Hood” highway robbery.)

And let’s face it, Ben Bernanke saying that he doesn’t know exactly

where the trillions of dollars of bailout money went to, doesn’t exactly endear you to us-the ever declining Middle Class.

Not that you have to worry about what we think.

(It’s not like you don’t run the world or anything.)

That’s why we’re writing directly to you. We used to write to Congress, but then we realized that we should talk to the people

who are really in charge.

(With life being so short and all, we don’t really have time

to talk to your staff.)

Why don’t the good guys among you talk directly to us

(and also to your errant peers) so that this corruption epidemic

can finally be stopped. We could actually help you make the world

a better place for everyone, if you would come out as honest and decent.

We’ll give you DearMiddleClass.com so that you can let us know

how it’s going and how we can help.

Btw, here’s a solution:

Tell your executive secretary (Barack Obama) to do the most obvious thing in the world to take the corruption and stupidity out of our corrupted election process:

Tell him to propose legislation that would give every qualifying candidate for president equal free television time to talk directly

to the American people.

(If they can do it in other thriving, highly educated, democratic societies-why can’t they do it here?)

Americans own the airwaves, yet the networks act

as if “from sea to shining sea” is their property.

It isn’t.

Taxpayers own the airwaves.

Take the money and corruption out of elections:

Require all TV Networks to give equal amounts

of free television air time to all qualifying presidential candidates as rental fees for TV Network use of the taxpayer-owned airwaves.

Members of congress could actually spend their time working for

the American people, instead of always trying to raise zillions of

dollars from those who seek to own them.

There would be plenty of live televised debates and press conferences.

Of course, the television and advertising agency executives

won’t like the loss of income.

(Poor, poor billionaire executives. We’ll have to help them deal with their grieving process over losing their iron grip on our elections.)

They’d have to come up with more creative television material

to fill the void. (See: dearjonstewart.com)

Once the outrageously expensive and deceptive political television

advertising is no longer king, American taxpayers will finally get

to experience a level playing field.

Imagine if politicians spent their time actually solving

problems instead of raising money?

It’s a national security issue.

We need Congress protecting our freedoms, not becoming beholden

to corrupt billionaires and war profiteers who abuse the system.

(It’s all pretty obvious, isn’t it?)

Save trillions.

Make politicians speak directly to Americans.

(If they’re going to lie, make them lie to our faces.)

Put Goldman Sachs, Haliburton, Anthem, Bank of America, etc.

on a level playing field with hard-working, taxpaying citizens.

Duh.

Take care and write back soon.

Kisses,

Your pals,

The Middle Class

contact: americantaxpayers@dearbenbernanke.com

(916) 296-4639

Be ashamed to die until you have won

some victory for humanity

                                  Horace Mann